I don’t care one jot about blog stats.
Okay, I’m understating that a bit. When I log in I take a brief glance at the day’s total page hits but otherwise I don’t care.
Well, okay, that too is an understatement. I perhaps drill down and see which individual pages are doing business that day. But that’s all.
Yes, okay, okay, I check the page hits. I scan search engine referrals. I note the click-throughs.
I write all the figures down in a notebook I keep in a shoebox tied with old string under my bed, which happens to contain my collection of mummified squirrel parts…
I made that last bit up, but I do still take an interest in the stats my blog gets. I haven’t relapsed into being a slave to them as I once was. If the numbers dip, they dip. If they soar, they soar. More often, they plateau in the way only a plateau can.
Imagine my shock then, dear reader, when I looked at my home page this evening and saw this…
Just in case you’re missing it, here’s some help…
What the bloody hell!! Over 3,000 followers? Yesterday there were around 150! I felt the hard work which goes into my craft had really paid off. This was, for me, the big time. Oh yes…
Ah but no. A shufty under the bonnet reveals a more prosaic reason why my subscriber numbers have rocketed. WordPress has tinkered in the way only it can.
Subscriber numbers, in addition to actual blog followers, now include all TWITTER FOLLOWERS AND FACEBOOK FRIENDS. I wonder how all my Twitter followers and Facebook friends feel about that? Hey you, spammy git who I forgot to unfollow, thanks for following my blog. Hope you like my work. And you, Facebook chummy who I played Fishville with once, and who, I suspect, doesn’t have English as a first language? It’s great to have you along.
What kind of nonsense is this?
If I’m going to
obsess take an interest in stats they at least need to be meaningful. It’s like tagging everyone I’ve ever talked to in real life as friends. So, as much as I’d like to crow about this number, it means nothing.
If you are a Facebooker or Tweeter who happens to get caught up in the dragnet, thanks for stopping by. You are a stat on my homepage, but if you want to be more than that, hit the “Sign me up (north)” button and join the few who get my febrile ramblings lobbed into their inbox every so often.
And if you already are a subscriber, I thank you from the heart of my bottom. You’ll be comforted to know I have your details in the notebook in the shoebox under my bed. And no squirrels were harmed.